Until this week.
This week, I had a meeting arranged in a café in Cinema City, and I drove off there curious to find out what the Noah's Ark thingy was all about.
I parked in the underground carpark, took the lift up to ground floor - and my eyes nearly fell out of my head when the doors opened: Before me was a huge water fountain / pool thingy, presided over by a white marble statue of something straight out of the Roman Acropolis.
I'd love to tell you that's as bad as it got, but I'd be lying. Massive TV screens line the whole outside wall beneath the roof of Cinema City, flashing ads, movie promos and who-knows-what-else at you, non-stop.
But that's not all: Cinema City is full of statues, models and massive colour pictures of popstars and movie stars. You can't move without getting an eyeball-full of Madonna, or R2D2, or Arnold Schwarzenegger, or Elizabeth Taylor, or Charlie Chaplin.
And it's all done super-big, blown up in grand style.
Ancient Rome, modern Jerusalem
The more I wandered around in a daze, the more I started to think: "This is exactly how the old pagan temples must have looked like, in Roman times!"
And it was so icky. Now that I've been out of 'Hollywood Culture' for years, and I've stopped watching movies and readings magazines, it's got much easier to work out the emotional state of the 'stars' from their faces, posture and general appearance.
As I looked around at all the massive, and massively-overdone star portraits, I could see the arrogance literally dripping off the walls. But that's not all: so many of the stars looked dead miserable, literally like they wanted to kill themselves.
It seemed to split into two distinct camps: arrogant, cocky, evil people who really believed they were the king (or queen) of the world; or quietly despairing, miserable, empty people who were stuck being a successful 'star', even though it was destroying them on every level.
After a few minutes stargazing, I started to feel nauseous and had to go outside.
Which is when I came face-to-face with the next disturbing scene: Bible Land!
For those of you who don't know, Bible Land is a group of around 50 tableaux depicting scenes from the Bible, like Adam and Eve, Cain killing his brother Abel, Yaacov meeting Rachel at the well, and so on and so forth.
Each tableau included at least one oversized statue of the people or person in question: Shimshon carrying away the Philistines' front door; Yosef meeting his brothers; Avraham sending Hagar away, etc.
It also had the relevant verse in Hebrew, as well as an English Translation that read like it came straight out of the St James Edition Bible…
Which is when more red flags went up in my head, because Judaism forbids us to make complete statue-type images of human beings, and that particularly applies to holy people like the patriarchs, because it's a hairsbreadth away from idol worship.
As I examined the handsome, beardless Yosef; and the handsome, beardless King David; and the Shimshon dressed like a clone of Spartacus, the Jewish-Roman Gladiator, I had a flash-back of seeing very similar statues to these in the Vatican.
Of course there, the statues are on a much bigger scale, but in terms of how it felt spiritually, it was exactly the same unholy, icky feeling.
I don't know who's behind 'Bible Land', and who paid for it all, including the Noah's Ark, but the whole place was oozing idol worship.
'Pagan Practicises Land'
I left, came back to my car, and got out of that place ASAP.
Things are so weird in the world that very few things manage to shock me, these days, but Cinema City still has the dubious kudos of shocking me, at least a little bit. I can't believe that somewhere so blatantly pagan just got built slap-bang in the centre of the Holy City. I'd love to know who funded Cinema City, and whether he wears a little purple skullcap and lives in Italy…
In the meantime, my best advice is to stay the heck away from that place. In Jerusalem's Cinema City, 'Star worship' is still alive and well, pagan practices and idols are all over the place, and it's definitely no place for a believing Jew - or their children - to hang out in, regardless of Noah's Ark.