But it's just not true. As anyone who's genuinely tried to live their emuna can tell you, having emuna doesn't mean these things never happen; it just means that these things happen much less, and that you get back up off the floor much faster afterwards.
Rebbe Nachman wrote about this phenomenon in Lesson 5 of Likutey Moharan, where he talks about how important it is to know how to serve G-d in the 'down' as well as in the 'up'.
Downs happen to all of us.
Maybe, we got seriously ill, or fired, or divorced, or poor, or chronically lonely. When these hard times happen, as they do to everyone, OF COURSE we should make every effort to still see the good, and to be grateful for everything, and to re-double our efforts to get close to G-d, and to pray more.
But despite all this, sometimes, we'll still get down. We'll still feel like G-d doesn't care about us, or that our problems are never going to end, or that we haven't got the strength to continue any more.
And when we're in those situations, being told to 'stop whining and be grateful' just rubs salt into the wound, and makes us feel even more unloved, useless and far away from G-d.
So what would be useful for us to hear, at those times?
From my own experience, this is how you can help a person experiencing a spiritual 'down' to get back on their feet.
1. Validate their feelings. Don't rush to tell them to 'cheer up' or 'don't worry' or 'stop complaining'. If you're not dealing with a drama queen who's always making mountains out of molehills, then just hearing the person out and genuinely empathising with them could turn things around all by itself.
2. Remind them that G-d still loves them. Especially if they're going through a spiritual 'down' and they've fallen away from some or all of the mitzvoth they use to do, telling them that G-d still loves them can give them hope that there is still a way back to Him.
3. Tell them they're normal. Spiritual falls, doubts and confusion happens to everyone, even the biggest tzadikim. Falling down is part of any genuine attempt to grow. A person who isn't falling away from their spiritual certainties, at least occasionally, is faking their spiritual journey.
4. Help them to see their good points. This is just a bad stage, but all their good and potential and talents are still there, they just need you to remind them about how great they actually are.
5. Reassure them that 'this too will past'. The hard times don't last forever. Even the darkest night ends, and the dawn comes. Encourage them that things are going to turn around in the blink of an eye, because G-d loves them.
Sometimes, there are hard things that we have to go through just because they were decreed for us from the beginning of the world, and not because we did something wrong, or didn't grow a beard like we were supposed to.
But everything has its season. The suffering doesn't last for ever, the difficulty doesn't continue ad infinitum; we just have to hold on to G-d, and not get broken by the challenging process we find ourselves in, that's only been sent to help us fix something profound in our souls.
If we tell people they're not to blame; that G-d's behind it all, and that G-d loves them and is truly only doing this for their good - and we genuinely believe it ourselves - those words can help to heal even the deepest heart-break.
And when someone really starts to feel that they aren’t alone, they aren't crazy, they aren't to blame, they aren't bad, that's when they'll start to heal, and they'll find the strength to get up off the floor, and continue their journey onwards, towards G-d and some spiritual peace of mind.